Help me figure out why I have gaming latency

Didn't you say that at one of your friend's houses you get good game play? Try setting up a VPN between your houses, put the PS5 on a VLAN that only has VPN access, and play through your friend's connection.... see what happens.

Good idea ... what I need to create a vpn between 2 houses could you guide me please?

Seriously it's really all the games ! Not only fifa... really !

If both sites have OpenWrt you just set up wire guard. https://openwrt.org/docs/guide-user/services/vpn/wireguard/basics

You will need the address of your friend, maybe use a DDNS service so your friend publishes his IP to a particular domain name.

https://www.duckdns.org/ for example

Then some routing rules... https://docs.openwrt.melmac.net/pbr/

Basically put your PS5 on it's own vlan and route all traffic from that vlan to the VPN tunnel...

My advice is use jitsi or zoom or Google meet or whatever to set up the vlan between the two houses, so you can share screens etc

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Thanks Daniel, unfortunately I don't have the skills to configure and establish this kind of connections! Would a VPS be easier to design maybe?

You can configure pbr like this:

If it works then a way forward would be to rent vps and use that for your gaming addiction I mean hobby.

Thanks for your help!
But until I find out why my ping under load is becoming disastrous I will never know which way to go!

Impressive! Getting close to a full second...

Well there's your problem!

My guess is if you are running cake and still get this high ping, it is some ISP equipment that is congested. Take snapshots of this test every day for a week then call your ISP and escalate to their engineering staff by saying you have evidence their system is causing delay of almost 1 second.

@dlakelan
It is the connection without cake, but when I remove this latency with cake, I still feel this latency of one second. I think that despite the connection this latency remains somewhere outside my network.

You need to run ping to 20 or 30 different destinations continuously for several days and see when and to which destinations does this latency actually appear if you can't find a ping destination that has latency then it's not Network latency that's causing your problem

In my case I was also facing gaming latency where enemies jump out on me killing me instantly and I am like wtf. Sure, the game netcode is to blame if you're living near the server with your both gaming rig & the router is up-to-date and have enough bandwidth. If you're wired and getting constant ping like 9-11 ms then yeah full blame it on game's netcode.
But if you're getting more than 30ms ping then there should be multiple hops between you and the server. I'd test packet loss using mtr and confirm if any of the hop is misbehaving. mtr isn't a perfect solution but it at least gives you an idea where and how many packets are getting dropped on the way to the server back and forth.
For me I realized few of hops from my ISP were bad. almost 44% or more packet loss. So I decided to use cloudflare WARP vpn + wireguard. Why WARP? bcz it's server is close to my city ping is almost 4 ms.
Once I switched to WARP + wireguard, my gaming experience got better bcz VPN makes it's own route to the server rather ISP's. Although it added few ms extra lag because of VPN overhead. But it's not much. My in-game hitreg improved. Started winning more matches, and I barely see enemies jumping on me killing me instantly in ranked.
Maybe first try mtr, find out packet loss in every hop. If loss is too much then switch to wireguard with your preferred VPN and test your game.

hops along the path often just don't respond to pings reliably, this doesn't mean they are dropping packets destined for other sources. If your final destination is responding reliably to pings, then the loss along the way is just that machine saying "nope I'm not gonna respond to your ping".

But yes, changing routes via VPN is a viable method for creating a more consistent experience.

But in some cases what if they are dropping the packets because of many reasons. That could be a possibility correct?

Yes usually what this looks like is packet loss from all sites beyond the congested site.

According to my understanding of the internet loop, data that comes from outside delayed on port wan of my router and that I have created a queue and prioritizes rather a flow than another is only about the output to the outside ... to the internet ... then logically, a vpn, VPS with WG or Openvpn or optimal configuration will not change the delay at the entrance of the wan ... which is why whatever I do I always have this permanent delay!

I can't process data that I haven't received yet, and even if I'm faster than the wan I'll still be late

Why don't you start fresh setup. Just setup your WAN and try playing games? Don't add sqm or any custom queues. Are you on 22.03.2 firmware version?

Danial, I'm confused. If there are 10 hops in between router and the server. Among them, 2 hops not responding to ICMP so it'll show 100% loss. I get that machine doesn't want to answer my ICMP packets.

But if there are 2 more hops which are giviing 30-40% loss. It basically means the machine is either congested or bugged that it causes to drop incoming/outgoing TCP/UDP packets. Am I right?

Yes I have the latest version of OpenWrt .. and Yes I started from scratch. Router in bridge mode and game console connection, initiate pppoe connections on the console directly. It's the easiest way, I get a Nat1 and no peripheral to disturb the bandwidth ! I have the same latency as a configuration with cake and DSCP ! Go understand ... I reassure you that neither the rj45 cables nor the monitor, nor the console (Xbox, ps4, ps5, PC) gives the same delay.

if all the hops after the special machine are dropping packets, then yes something is wrong. If only some of them are dropping packets but ones farther out are replying, then nothing is wrong.