Please help me optimise my terrible ADSL connection

Hi. Let me start out by saying I'm very new to Openwrt and SQM and I have a few questions about how to use it in my network.

Here is the info I do know:
Our connection is 18mbit down and 1.5mbit up ADSL.

Current network setup is:

Sky modem/router ---(LAN to WAN)--- Edgerouter X(ER-X) ---(LAN to LAN)---- TP-Link Deco mesh system 

The Sky modem/router does not have a bridge mode, has a DMZ set to 192.168.1.1(ER-X) to prevent double nat, and has an MTU size of 1492.
The TP-Link Deco mesh is in AP mode, so that should all be fine.

The ER-X has WAN port on eth0 and LAN to mesh AP on eth1.

Here are my current SQM settings:

root@OpenWrt:~# cat /etc/config/sqm

config queue 'eth1'
        option enabled '1'
        option interface 'eth0'
        option download '14000'
        option upload '1000'
        option qdisc 'cake'
        option script 'piece_of_cake.qos'
        option linklayer 'atm'
        option debug_logging '1'
        option verbosity '5'
        option qdisc_advanced '1'
        option squash_dscp '1'
        option squash_ingress '1'
        option ingress_ecn 'ECN'
        option egress_ecn 'NOECN'
        option qdisc_really_really_advanced '1'
        option overhead '44'
        option iqdisc_opts 'nat dual-dsthost ingress'
        option eqdisc_opts 'nat dual-srchost ack-filter'
root@OpenWrt:~#   tc -s qdisc
qdisc noqueue 0: dev lo root refcnt 2
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc mq 0: dev dsa root
 Sent 124284235779 bytes 96367636 pkt (dropped 4, overlimits 0 requeues 17132)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 17132
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :10 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :f limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :e limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :d limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :c limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :b limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :a limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :9 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :8 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :7 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 480583358 bytes 1017877 pkt (dropped 1, overlimits 0 requeues 5650)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 5650
  maxpacket 1078 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 1632 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :6 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 472936356 bytes 940183 pkt (dropped 2, overlimits 0 requeues 6922)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 6922
  maxpacket 549 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 1744 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :5 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 123330712891 bytes 94409543 pkt (dropped 1, overlimits 0 requeues 4560)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 4560
  maxpacket 18634 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 59133 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :4 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 3174 bytes 33 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :3 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :2 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc fq_codel 0: dev dsa parent :1 limit 10240p flows 1024 quantum 1518 target 5ms interval 100ms memory_limit 4Mb ecn drop_batch 64
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
  maxpacket 0 drop_overlimit 0 new_flow_count 0 ecn_mark 0
  new_flows_len 0 old_flows_len 0
qdisc cake 8061: dev eth0 root refcnt 17 bandwidth 1Mbit besteffort dual-srchost nat nowash ack-filter split-gso rtt 100ms atm overhead 44
 Sent 849241794 bytes 5719976 pkt (dropped 505356, overlimits 9067781 requeues 11)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 11
 memory used: 1152585b of 4Mb
 capacity estimate: 1Mbit
 min/max network layer size:           28 /    1486
 min/max overhead-adjusted size:      106 /    1696
 average network hdr offset:           14

                  Tin 0
  thresh          1Mbit
  target         18.2ms
  interval        113ms
  pk_delay       18.8ms
  av_delay       1.91ms
  sp_delay         55us
  backlog            0b
  pkts          6225332
  bytes       916640261
  way_inds        92619
  way_miss       127278
  way_cols            0
  drops           47883
  marks            5068
  ack_drop       457473
  sp_flows            1
  bk_flows            2
  un_flows            0
  max_len         31122
  quantum           300

qdisc ingress ffff: dev eth0 parent ffff:fff1 ----------------
 Sent 14335231056 bytes 11585300 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc noqueue 0: dev eth1 root refcnt 2
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc noqueue 0: dev eth2 root refcnt 2
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc noqueue 0: dev eth3 root refcnt 2
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc noqueue 0: dev eth4 root refcnt 2
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc noqueue 0: dev br-lan root refcnt 2
 Sent 0 bytes 0 pkt (dropped 0, overlimits 0 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
qdisc cake 8062: dev ifb4eth0 root refcnt 2 bandwidth 14Mbit besteffort dual-dsthost nat wash ingress no-ack-filter split-gso rtt 100ms atm overhead 44
 Sent 14215129572 bytes 11383813 pkt (dropped 201487, overlimits 19694222 requeues 0)
 backlog 0b 0p requeues 0
 memory used: 1143Kb of 4Mb
 capacity estimate: 14Mbit
 min/max network layer size:           46 /    1500
 min/max overhead-adjusted size:      106 /    1749
 average network hdr offset:           14

                  Tin 0
  thresh         14Mbit
  target            5ms
  interval        100ms
  pk_delay       4.59ms
  av_delay        425us
  sp_delay         18us
  backlog            0b
  pkts         11585300
  bytes     14502912208
  way_inds       288628
  way_miss       112263
  way_cols            0
  drops          201487
  marks         1169650
  ack_drop            0
  sp_flows            2
  bk_flows            1
  un_flows            0
  max_len         12112
  quantum           427

As you can see, there is some packets being dropped on the ingress and I have no idea why.

Now to my questions.

  1. What should my MTU be on everything since it says 1492 in the admin page of the Sky router?

  2. What should my link layer be set to since the ER-X is connecting to another router? I have it on atm 44 currently, is that correct?

  3. Should I be separating my ingress and egress settings onto two separate devices like eth0 and eth1 since eth1 is my LAN connection? I've seen some people do this but know know why.

  4. What should squash DSCP and ignore DSCP be set to? I know nothing about DSCP or if it is even in use here.

  5. How would you adjust my cake settings/options? Do I need the ack-filter option? besteffort seems to be used by default, is that fine or should I be using diffserv? All tips and suggestions welcome.

The main goal here is to keep ping as consistent as possible. Our connection suffers from very bad bufferbloat, +120ms on download and +300ms on upload before I setup the SQM.
There are two tvs that stream netflix and iptv, not always at the same time but it does happen. I don't really care about keeping download speeds high because its basically non-existent already. I just want ping as stable as possible for the pcs and playstations in the house.

I have googled all of this to death in recent weeks but I'm just not sure on what the correct answers are. There are too many conflicting opinions out there.

Please let me know if I have left out any info need and thanks in advance.